Images That Outlast Us Both: My Purpose Beyond the Camera

“Well done, good and faithful servant.” The words every believer longs to hear. The words so many have already earned.

I went deep into my hard drive archives yesterday to get these images. I took them back in 2021 in preparation for the 4th of July. I used these images a lot that year though. I chose the location for these images very intentionally. While it’s got an amazing view the lighting is usually terrible with harsh direct light and nothing to diffuse it with. Still we shot here because I can always count on it to be windy, which given the emphasis on the American Flag I knew the wind would be a key factor. Something truly special happened that evening though. The marine layer rolled in over the hills of the Santa Ynez Valley in a way I rarely see and the lighting turned out perfectly. Overall the images turned out darker and more moody than my usual style, which given the events of 2021 felt appropriate. I used these images for the 4th of July, when we left behind our 13, and a 9/11 memorial. Then I moved on, they had served their purpose, I didn’t want to overshare the same content, and they were lost to my archives.

Yesterday though I went searching for them again. In the wake of Charlie Kirk’s assassination, the murder of Iryna Zarutska, the school shooting at Evergreen High School, and the 24th anniversary of 9/11, I felt the need to give these images new life. I mourned all that we have lost as I re-edited these images, both as a body of believers and a nation. As a body of believers we have lost a brother, as a community we have lost our children, as citizens we have lost our compatriots, and as a nation we have lost our first responders and defenders.

Times such as these lead one into reflection. I have spent years trying to find the balance in my business between sharing who I am while also not sharing anything that might ostracize a potential client. I think being truthful about the cornerstones my life is built upon is the best way to allow God to work through me. I want to be clear, I am a Christian first and an American second. From a young age my prayer has been that those I come in contact with would be able to see Jesus through me. But, with recent reflection I am wondering if that is enough? Is it enough to hope my faith will set me apart if I never acknowledge it outwardly? I don’t know, but I don’t want to get to the end of my life and find out the answer is no. So while I’m not going to overhaul my personality and life direction I am not going to shy away from sharing my faith.

In order to understand why I’m so passionate about photography you first need to understand what got me to this point. As a young child I wanted to be a veterinarian, not just because I loved animals but because I loved people. The first question I always got when I told people what I wanted to be was if I would be able to handle euthanizing animals. I’ll admit I always had to fight an eye roll at this question, were these adults questioning my resilence? Didn’t they know I grew up on a working cattle ranch? While I was surrounded by the miracle of life I was also surrounded by death. Barn cats would disappear, ranch dogs would grow old and frail, chicks would get attacked, horses would colic, calves would be stillborn, I personally bottle-fed calves and piglets just for them to be sent to slaughter to provide food for people I never met. Of course I wanted to be a veterinarian so I could help animals, even if that meant putting them down, but more importantly I wanted to be the one in the room handling that animal with dignity and care, creating a space for the owners to be able to mourn and remember. When I got to high school Chemistry I realized I wasn’t going to be able to be a veterinarian. Some of us are just not created with the brain necessary for the medical field. This sent me into a tailspin, I had been so sure of my path for so long, now what was I supposed to do? I thought of becoming a high school history teacher. First, because the teenage years can be notoriously hard and I could work to make my classroom a place where teens felt seen and valued. Second, because I love history and I believe that history that is not learned is doomed to be repeated. However, every college I talked to was adamant that a teaching credential had to be completed in a fifth year, another door closed, because I only had the funds for four years. At this point I threw up my hands and stated I should just be a waitress. While many laughed and expressed the ridiculousness in waitressing as a career, I had a much deeper reason than most people realized. Above all I wanted a career that would allow me to be the bright part in someone else’s dark day. For as many times as I have eaten in a restaurant on a day of celebration I have also eaten at a restaurant on some of my darkest days. If this was true for me it was probably true for others and I wanted the chance to be the one who gave them a reason to smile through the pain, to help them feel seen, valued, and cared for. Throughout all of this photography was my hobby. I took pictures of whatever interested me and I was learning how to use my camera and create art. But above all I knew I was creating memories. I captured the sunrise over the Pacific Ocean the weekend my now husband and I met, I memorialized the first day my little brother spent with his first puppy, I documented the vast landscapes along the Blue Ridge Mountains as I roadtripped them with my family. Then there was a shift, as more life was lived I realized the things we remember best usually have aid. Photographs can be one of those aids. So while I do believe in all the reasons behind why we typically take photos, I am always thinking about what is to become of those photos. I pray and strive to create art and capture moments that will help people remember, so that when a dark day comes maybe my images can help those days be a little less black. God took my heart for serving others and I believe He gave me a career that allows me to do so twofold. I serve people well in the present by capturing the moment they are in and giving them art that they can treasure. More importantly however, and the part I may never see, is the in the future when those images are no longer just a treasure but an heirloom.

So I will continue my work as a photographer, but if you choose to work with me I hope you know that I am praying I create something special because I expect my images to outlast us both. This is my career because of my God given desire to serve other’s well and the deep need to bring a smile to someone’s face on their darkest day.

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.”

It is my goal, both in my personal and professional life to love my neighbor, pray for those who protect us, and strive to be like Jesus here on earth. I hope you will join me.